Sunday, June 1st 2014


So is Colorado basically high all the time now, or what?
posted @ 11:30 am in [ ]

Since the beginning of this year, when Colorado started having perfectly legal retail pot shops, the assumption has been that Colorado has become populated entirely with stoners.

I am here to tell you, gentle reader, that no more people in Colorado seem to be high than before. Society has utterly failed to unravel. Children and grandmas everywhere appear to be unable to throw the rest of their lives away on the reefer. Probably a few more people smoke it now than would have before because of the now very low legal risk, but, as one of my students pointed out in class this past semester, “If there were a vending machine full of crack rock out in the hall, would we all become crackheads in here?”

Indeed, I don’t really care for vodka. A vodka bar could open up in my living room, and I probably wouldn’t drink any more vodka than I do now. In essence, you’re likely to smoke (or vape) out, or you’re not. If you are, you were going to anyway, and if you’re not, the ready accessibility doesn’t change anything.

Here’s what I like about it, though: the openness. Let’s face it, a lot of Colorado smoked weed recreationally before. Now, nobody’s hiding that fact, or talking about it in whispers, or pretending it’s not going on when it is. We all talk about weed like we talk about booze, which is probably as it should be. It only took a few months for that full transformation to happen.

You know who’s really high in Colorado? Out-of-state visitors. The narco-tourism is pretty hilarious. Narco-tourists make a big deal out of everything, get really messed up and silly, and it’s largely OK with us, because they’re basically happily emptying their pockets into the state coffers to do it. It’s probably how people from Amsterdam feel about their narco-tourists: OK, welcome to Colorado, silly person. Enjoy yourself!

And now, I’m going to the weekly Seeds & Stems Festival, where we sort all our weed in a huge pile on an album cover the size of a city block.

Just kidding! (It would have to be way bigger than that.)