I was at a party not too long ago where I had an opportunity for empirical research, and therefore, public service, thrust upon me. I was listening in polite sympathy to some jerk droning on about his crappy job. He began complaining about one co-worker in particular, and then he got kind of personal, talking about her always having PMS. He then expanded his criticism to a host of other women in his life and claimed they always had perpetual PMS as well.
“Do you know how many women actually suffer from PMS?” I asked. He admitted he didn’t. In truth, estimates vary wildly, but most sources not explicitly trying to sell women something put the range between 10 and 20 percent. Jerkwad seemed surprised by that statistic.
“How come ALL the women I know seem to have it?” he countered.
“Hmm,” I said, considering the proposition thoughtfully, “It seems the common denominator there is you. Have you considered that perhaps you just have a particular talent for pissing women off? Might be a theory worth considering.”
“It’s not a theory,” he sneered at me, “it’s just a stupid hypothesis.”
“It’s a theory now,” I replied with a wry smile and was careful to just barely catch his toe under my high-heeled shoe as I walked away.
Hooray for positivism!